Journey of Faith

Every year on this date I intend on writing a post but never can find the words. My love for Virginia Tech, Hokies, and the community is so strong. The pain of that day still holds on strong.

After hearing of the shootings in NRV mall last week, the explosions in Boston yesterday, and today marking 6 years since the Virginia Tech shooting my heart is heavy and am a bit overwhelmed with uneasiness. I don't want to let fear dictate my life but this world we live in is just so scary. I want to wrap my arms around my daughter and protect her forever. I know that isn't all too plausible. My only hope is trusting in the Lord but honestly that is hard for me. I just don't understand this world and sometimes the purpose of it all is unclear.

I have spent the last six years silently questioning God, tiptoeing around my faith, and trying to ignore many of these feelings of doubt. I recently decided to challenge myself to dig deeper in the Word in hopes to grasp a better understanding of who Jesus is, my purpose, and to gain general knowledge of the Bible. If I am going to claim this faith I want to do it boldly.

I think parenthood has transformed my desire to search a little deeper, rather than live in my current state of ignorance. When my kid(s) start to ask questions about God and faith I want to be equipped with Scripture to help them find answers and understanding for themselves. I am afraid I have been living blindly for much too long.

I really don't know where this journey will lead me in my faith, but my hope is that it will draw me closer to Lord and offer more peace in my life. I desire to know God more and let go of all this doubt, lack of understanding, anger, and fear. 

So here I am six years later hoping to move forward but always remembering those lost.

Luke 19:10
"For the Son of Man came to seek and to save the lost."